#1 Men get a spring in their step. Women get a spring in their step. Suddenly, everyone’s feeling punch-drunk on Vitamin D and everywhere looks so much… nicer.
#2 You realise you have nothing suitable to wear (if you’re a woman). You rejoice at reacquainting yourself with your trusty old friends the three-quarter-length-shorts-and-tee combo (if you’re a man).
#3 You rue ever having promised family, friends, colleagues or clients that you would be anywhere or do anything that involves having to leave the sunny oasis that is your back garden. How do those fortunate enough to live in sunnier climes get anything done?
#4 You debate how long leftover suntan lotion stays effective for but carry on regardless using up the last of the previous summer’s bottles and sprays.
#5 Lettuce becomes high currency with not a leaf to be seen on the supermarket shelves as everyone has the same idea on the same few days of the year.
#6 You find yourself complaining that it’s… wait for it… TOO HOT. But at least you have the decency to feel guilty about it.
#7 You discover how effective (or not) your deodorant really is. “24+ hour protection? I don’t think so!”
#8 You nod off at strange times of the day. “Whaa… what time is it? How long was I out for?” Or if you’re really lucky, you slope off for an impromptu siesta of the non-nodding off kind. (About the only invitation capable of getting you off your lounger and back indoors!)
#9 When, finally, you do have to tear yourself away from the sun and return to real life you do so sporting a pink glow so conspicuous that it would rival James Cameron’s blue Na’vi people for curiosity factor. “Someone caught a bit of sun at the weekend…”
#10 Within days, your bikini or shorts are but a distant memory as you find yourself dressed in layers for warmth and toying with whether it’s acceptable to put the heating on… in June!!!! Ah, the great British summer.
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